- prepare food
- heat that bitch up
- smell the yummy goodness
- resist urge to shove food in mouth
- let stand 10 minutes before serving
Does anybody ever follow the last two steps? Anybody?
I can tell you who doesn't. *points to forehead*
My Brain.
Because of My Brain, I have been victim to scorched taste buds and displaced roof-of-mouth skin on more than one occassion (lots more).
I know I should wait. I know I could possibly injur myself bad enough to lose my sense of taste for a few days. But I take that chance. "It'll be ok," I think.
It's never ok.
I could spend hours preparing food. But the second it comes off the stove or out of the oven, I am unable to wait just 10 more minutes. And I don't know why.
My most recent experience was when we ordered pizza. I grabbed a slice and bit into it. With my amazing luck a huge part of the cheese came off with my bite. Half was in my mouth, and the other half rested on my bottom lip. My first instinct should've been to spit it out. It wasn't. Instead, I tried to slurp it up. The piece of cheese slowly dragged across my bottom lip and into my mouth, where it continued to burn the shit out of my mouth.
Smart move, Brain.
I was worried that I was going to wake up in the morning to a blistered bottom lip. And that I'd have to somehow explain it. I was lucky enough that it didn't cause any damage. I only had a numb lip for the remainder of the night.
It's not only cooked food. I fuck up on cereal, too. I fill my bowl with Apple Jacks and milk and instead of waiting for those sugary O's to soften up a little bit, I go crazy on account of the sweetness and start on the bowl immediately. Afterwards, I'm left with the roof of my mouth tore up.
I'm an extremely patient person, but when it comes to food, every ounce of my patience goes out the window.
